jus a post to kinda.. pour out my feelings?

it's de time of de sem again, where every1 is rushing their final assignments and as usual im lacking behind. my poly frens hav proved their worth once again.. all of them care so much for me but i feel like im always disappointing them.

itsma this sem i grouped with nadiah,shidah and hanis. de group with a thorn among de roses as mr hoo called it.:S they're really really nice to me. even though i did de easiest option and was de most slack 1 among them. they would still constantly ask me how my work was progressing,if i needed help even though i didn ask them.

dbas,i grouped with kaiwen,javier and ruihao. wel.. similarly to inks last sem,they tanked the whole group component for me. they did it bcos they were afraid i couldn cope..? thx alot guys. so i finished up my own individual part which wasn tat hard. finished it today and handed it to javier for compilation.

anyway today.. well.. i oso dunno how say. a 'fren' tat i've always been helping through her assignments. i dunno to say if i was lucky or nt tat i was with jervois and de whole bunch. i agreed to help her do her assignment,but then de rest told me tat i shouldn as it was her work and she shud hav started earlier. then we rmb-ed tat de report was due on friday and nt tmr. so i told her tat she could come to sch tmr to get de vm,then finish it. i oso assured her de work can be easily finished in lesser than a day cos everything was in de lecture slides. she told me she was running a fever and unable to come tmr. thus i offered go to her house and pass her de vm personally. she then told me she had chicken pox and asked me to jus do the assignment for her.

jervois and de rest were all getting abit angry by then and said she was jus coming up with excuses to make me do her work. it felt really bad cos i actually wanted to help.. and kaiwen bring my group ldr,forbidded me to help her bcos he said im risking their lives + her grp members lives if it was caught for plagarism. but i knew he said tat bcos he didn wan me to be made use of.

she started talking bout her itsma is goin to fail so she couldn afford to fail dbas oso,i then assured her tat she wont fail itsma bcos mr hoo is planning to access her on another day. she then changed topic back to dbas and asked me to help her. she then gave me her admin no. and told me she gtg and went offline. it was then i realise,she jus wanted me to do her work for her. she was online,she jus blocked me so she would appear offline to me. de rest of de ppl with me all still saw her online.

she unblocked me aft awhile and asked me again to help her. i didn noe wat to reply so kaiwen typed for me and told her i needed to help with de group component due today so i'll be busy. she then blocked me again.

every1 else was furious,cept me of cos. and jervois was nagging at me for 2hrs saying i cant be so gullible all de time. tat i was too kind and ppl will take advantage of me..): yes i noe they're all angry bcos they care bout me. but haiyo dunno la.D: i've jus got this thinking tat every1 in de world is good. or wel tats wat i believe,every1 has at least some good in them. so tats y i treat every1 nice. i didn actually tink it'll backfire on me. but im nt angry or upset at any1. im jus abit shocked tats all.

life's like tat? eng huat told me not every1 in the world is worth saving,and even ziming who's like always super neutral and friendly told me,this kind of fren,really not good. hais..): i oso dunno wat to tink. no matter wat i'll still treat her as a fren la. as usual,i dun make enemies of ppl,only ppl make enemies of me. so.. it's ok im no hater.(: